Mmm... serve me up another slice of that yummy crow pie

I bow to your superior wisdom, O Enlightened Ones...

Since we're on the subject of books written by baby experts, I felt it was time for me to do a bit of mea culpa kowtowing. A couple of months ago, I wrote a blog entry expressing extreme frustration over my failed attempts to get Milo to conform to the kind of eating and sleeping schedule advocated by many baby experts and sleep specialists. You know, getting young infants to eat every three hours and sleep for at least an hour after every daytime feed -- that sort of thing.

Well, at the time it seemed like all my attempts were getting me nowhere and leaving me with a chronically fussy child to boot. This was mostly due to the fact that Milo's digestive problems were preventing him from getting enough to eat in one sitting and leaving him hungry and unable to sleep properly during his naptime. He was constantly hungry and tired -- a recipe for disaster, when it comes to dealing with a newborn.

And so I abandoned my attempts to get Milo to adhere to any sort of schedule and started listening to his signals for a change. I fed him whenever he wanted and only put him down for a nap when he actually looked sleepy, rather than when the clock was telling me to do so.

Well, within a week of me letting Milo do his own thing, he started following a fairly regular routine all on his own! He started eating every two or three hours, his naps became longer and more consistent, and he began going to bed at around the same time every night and settling very easily into sleep. He already had a schedule; it was just a little different than the one I was trying to force him to follow. But if it weren't for the books I'd read, I wouldn't have been able to recognize it.

Wouldn't you know it, I'd commited the first cardinal sin of childcare -- I had neglected to listen to my baby and take his individual needs into account. And this is something that all those baby expert books warn against, time and time again. If I'd only listened to THAT particular piece of advice, Milo and I might have achieved a happy equilibrium a whole lot sooner.

On top of that, I know I have baby experts Tracy Hogg (aka "the Baby Whisperer") and Dana Obleman to thank for teaching me how to get Milo to sleep so well at night. Their books really helped me understand the importance of implementing a consistent bedtime routine. Because of them, Milo now understands that after his bath and last feed, it's nighty-night time, and more often than not, he settles down in his crib without a fuss.

Of course, me being me (e.g., woefully imperfect), I'm still not following their advice to the letter. The Baby Whisperer advises against nursing right before bedtime, and Dana Obleman strongly cautions against using of soothers, and both of them believe that babies should always have their naps in the same place they sleep at night. I'm currently breaking all three of these rules. I let Milo have some of his naps in a little floor rocker we have, just so he can get used to sleeping in environments other than his crib. And, as I said before, Milo's a very sucky baby, and until he finally perfects his fist-sucking technique, I'm going to let him use the soother -- it's the only thing that settles him when he's seriously freaking out.

These "weaknesses" might come back to bite me on the ass someday, but for right now, Milo's happy and mama's happy and both of us are having good sleeps (most nights).

Milo and I might have our own ideas on how to deviate from the routines suggested by the experts, but it's only because we're building on the strong foundation of their advice that we're doing anything right at all.

So, three cheers for the baby experts! Thank god they're around to give us some ideas on how to deal with our babies when they start acting all wonky on us. Otherwise, there'd be a whole lot more only children out there, I'm sure.

Milo's very happy to hear that he might one day get a little brother or sister, provided he keeps up the good behavior. Dad, on the other hand, might be somewhat alarmed at the news.

p.s. I know that a lot of you moms out there tend to lean more towards the Dr. Sears' school of attachment parenting (e.g., co-sleeping), and that's totally cool, too. Whatever works for you and your baby is best. Milo and I, we wouldn't do so great with the whole co-sleeping thing. He's WAY too noisy and wiggly while sleeping, and I'm WAY too light a sleeper. He'd be having to deal with zombie-mom 24-7, and that wouldn't be good for either of us.